The fact is that our plans may have been ruined by a cup of curry.

This episode opens with another run-through of the prologue, which is there for literally no other reason than to fill time, but as the rest of the episode is hilarious, I’ll give it a pass.

The actual narrative opens with Nanami doing her thing, aka ordering her goons to sabotage Anthy’s cooking class assignment by switching out her curry ingredients with something super spicy (because in Japan, there’s more than just a single home ec class devoted to cooking).

Nanami: Just you wait and see…Utena Tenjou and Anthy Himemiya! Soon I’ll have you yelling in pain. This will teach my brother to ignore me.

Keiko: Nanami-sama!

Nanami: The fun’s about to start. Be quiet.

Keiko: I’m sorry, it’s just…[…]

Aiko: We didn’t switch in the hundred-fold curry.

Keiko: It said, “So spicy it’ll blow you to smithereens! Secret Pa-Ohn ultra-spicy nine billion-fold curry.”

and then the classroom explodes

Touga: My colleagues, the rules of the rose seal face a great crisis. Both the Rose Bride and the one she’s engaged to have been hurt. This situation wasn’t foreseen, even by End of the World. I’ve received information that their lives may be in danger.

Mickey: It’s my fault! […] I just told Himemiya-san that I wanted to eat a really spicy curry. Himemiya-san risked her life to make me that curry…

Touga: Well, I don’t think we can lay all the blame on you, Miki.

Juri: But what will we do? The fact is that our plans may have been ruined by a cup of curry.

and this is only the beginning of the absurdity

Utena and Anthy are abruptly released from the hospital…

Wakaba: Utena! Utena! Utena-sama! Oh, I was so worried about you! Are you all right now? I heard there was a huge explosion, but I didn’t realize…

Wakaba: I’m sorry! What was I thinking, jumping on you like I always do? […]

“Utena”: You needn’t do that. I’m fine. You needn’t have worried.

Wakaba: You’re acting weird.

“Utena” is speaking with Anthy’s voice, but evidently only the audience can hear that. But they can hear that “Utena” isn’t talking the way she normally does (with “boku” and such). And what do you know? “Anthy” is also acting strange…

Nanami’s goons are picking on her (as usual), and even slap her. Mickey is ready to defend her, but then “Anthy” does something unexpected.

Keiko: You…you slapped me. Even my own mother has never slapped me!

“Anthy”: If you want to keep yelling that junk at me, why don’t we have a real fight?

Mickey: It- it can’t be. Gentle, innocent Himemiya-san is…

Nanami’s goons proceed to investigate this curious phenomenon, taking an abundance of “spy pictures”.

Keiko: Anthy Himemiya and Utena Tenjou. Their behavior patterns have completely switched places.

Nanami: You’re right. But why?

Keiko: It all started after that curry explosion.

Nanami: (internally) Utena is Anthy and Anthy is Utena? Could the nine billion-fold spice have done it? But that’s silly!

And they’re selling the photos, because in the 90s, developing pictures was a tedious process, so you might as well have multiples made and sell them!

Schoolgirl 1: Seeing Anthy acting so macho is really cool.

Schoolgirl 2: And Utena acting so gentle is great, too!

Nanami: You’re selling them?

Aiko: They have an unusual appeal.

Keiko: And they’re equally popular with boys and girls.

Mickey: This is terrible. This…this isn’t like Himemiya-san at all! And besides that…! I hate myself for actually buying these.

Then Touga arrives on the scene to talk sense.

Touga: I thought they’d been acting strangely lately. Might you have something to do with it?

Nanami: O-oh no! It’s just, well, you know…

but he’s not immune to the charm of body-swapping utena and anthy, either

“Anthy”: Now I get it. So that’s the reason. I figured you guys were pulling the strings behind the scenes!

Touga: You’re mistaken.

Nanami: That’s right! You’re mistaken! My brother would never bother to meddle in your life! This is all my doing!

Touga: Nanami! You’ve really gone and done it this time.

Nanami: Forgive me, Big Brother! I just switched that secret spice from India into the mix so that Anthy could make a delicious curry in cooking class! I never imagined anything like this would happen! I don’t believe it!

I mean, she does have a fair point. Who would ever think that curry, no matter how spicy, would result in body swap shenanigans?

But when they conclude that it was the spice that did it, Touga sends Nanami off to India to get more of it in the hope that remaking the curry will change them back.

And of course the Shadow Players have something to add.

Girl A: And now, our latest lecture on 4-character terms for love and youth! Today’s is, “Divine justice.”

Girl B: Divine justice?

Girl A: It means if you do something bad, bad things will happen to you. […] When you do something bad, be ready to face the consequences.

Of course, the term for “divine justice” has four characters in Japanese. And while Nanami has certainly made life more difficult for Anthy, you might have noticed that an awful lot of animals just happen to attack Nanami, which…there might be an actual explanation for? But it won’t be coming anytime soon, so just keep that in mind.

But with Nanami & co out of the way (and the whole situation clarified for the audience), we can spend a little time actually considering how Utena and Anthy are reacting to their new situation.

“Utena”: Utena-sama! That’s amazing!

“Anthy”: There’s just something wrong about complimenting your own body.

“Utena”: I’ve never been good at sports, so it’s wonderful to see myself doing so well.

“Anthy”: Well, still, we have to find some way to get back to normal.

“Utena”: Don’t worry. I’m sure Nanami-san’s doing just fine.

Meanwhile, Nanami and her crew are being plagued elephants – AFRICAN elephants in INDIA. I’ve played Zoo Tycoon, I know Indian elephants are way smaller.

But “Anthy” has her own issues to deal with.

“Anthy”: Look, we have to turn back to normal as soon as we can. I don’t want to end up as some sacrifice to the rose seal!

“Utena”: It doesn’t matter to me if we stay this way. I don’t care about what I look like.

“Anthy”: Well I do care! Saionji’s been hitting on me.

It’s interesting to hear what Utena really thinks Anthy’s situation is (she’s way off in her assumptions here, for the record). On similar lines, note that they’ve both been dressing mostly the same as their bodies usual would (“Utena” keeps wearing the boy’s uniform and such). It might just be because the animators didn’t want to create new outfits, or you could read it as them not wanting to make a bigger deal out of it than it already is.

Anyhow, Saionji manages to get “Anthy” alone, much to her chagrin. But the situation turns out to be more innocent than it appears, as he only wants to exchange the diary.

Saionji: While I must content myself with our exchange diary for now, I’m practicing my swordsmanship and I swear I’ll win you back. Please wait until I do, Anthy.

Which leads into addressing the episode order. Apparently, this was originally supposed to be Episode 6, but it took longer to finish, hence the final episode order. Of course, the actual sixth episode included a reference to the exchange diary, too, so it’s not a real surprise here. In the end, though, I feel like this was a better set-up for episode 9, so it evens out in my opinion. The rest of the episode is so funny, it’s okay if this one joke with Saionji doesn’t land.

Anyhow, Utena’s concerned about Anthy’s privacy, so she doesn’t even want to open the diary at first.

“Utena”: Oh, that’s Saionji’s exchange diary, isn’t it? Well, Utena-sama, be sure you return that diary to him.

“Anthy”: Return it? Do you mean I’m supposed to write in it?

“Utena”: You happen to be Anthy Himemiya at the moment.

“Anthy”: But I can’t just butt in on your privacy! It just isn’t right…

“Utena”: It isn’t right?

“Anthy”: It isn’t.

But then “Utena” throws the diary in the trash!

“Anthy”: Hey, what’s the big idea? You’re such an extremist. You don’t have to throw it away.

“Utena”: I only continued that diary because you didn’t say it wasn’t right. As long as you say it isn’t right, I can’t continue writing in Saionji’s exchange diary.

“Anthy”: Look, all I’m trying to say is…

“Utena”: Yes?

“Anthy”: I’m just starting to feel a little sorry for Saionji.

So she finally cracks it open, and is met with this.

“Anthy”: “Dear Anthy, even now I still dream about it. Of when you and I were engaged.” There, you see? This guy’s really serious. Oh brother…”My beloved Anthy, I’m sorry for how long you’ve had to wait. Though for now I must content myself with this diary, I swear, I’ll totally defeat that stuck-up, ugly tomboy, Utena Tenjou, and take you back!” […] I think this could use a little pepping up…

And she finds ample motivation to write in the diary after seeing that!

and nanami’s still being pursued by elephants, even at sea

The next day, “Anthy” returns the diary, with Utena doing her best to imitate Anthy’s voice and speech patterns.

And Touga discovers Saionji loitering in the greenhouse.

Saionji: Mark my words, Touga. The Rose Bride will soon return to me. […] Nothing can come between the love we share. Not even the rules of the rose seal.

Touga: Oh? Anthy, eh?

“Anthy”: Saionji-senpai!

Saionji: Ah, Anthy. I’ve been waiting.

“Anthy”: I’m sorry. Once I started writing what I really felt, I just couldn’t stop! Please, take it.

Saionji: I see…it’s about me! I’ll finally know what your true feelings for me are! Now, then…

and all that she’s written is “DUMBASS” all across the page in big letters

But then Nanami finally shows up with the curry spice…and trips on a banana peel, spilling it all and scattering it to the winds

Naturally, this is very discouraging, particularly for Utena. But “Utena” prepares curry for everyone, anyway.

And then the twist: Nanami’s goons discover that the spice wasn’t even used!

Keiko: It doesn’t look like it was ever used in that curry.

“Anthy”: Which means…that explosion…!

Nanami: It wasn’t the spice at all!

“Anthy” and Nanami: It was Anthy’s cooking!

Mickey: That’s incredible, Himemiya-san! An explosive curry that switches the eaters’ personalities. A new invention!

“Utena”: Oh my. I don’t know what to say.

The implication, of course, is that Anthy knew what the issue was all along, and let Nanami go on that wild goose chase just to make her suffer a little! Considering how much Anthy’s had to suffer at HER hands, though, it seems like an apt punishment.

And when Saioinji shows up to complain about what “Anthy” wrote in the diary, “Utena” offers him some curry…and then there’s an explosion.

Utena: What a pain the whole thing was! I never want to eat curry again!

Anthy: I agree.

Utena: And besides that…[…] What should we do about him?

and “saionji” is out in a tree saying “chu”

until next time…